do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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