The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
Randomize
