State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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