you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Randomize
