pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
Randomize
