google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
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