Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
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