Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
he puts the penis in happiness.
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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