You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
just come out here and I will go home with you...
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
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