I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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