Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
Randomize
