..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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