We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Randomize
