His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
This spray tan I used isn't working out. I spent an hour exfoliating and rubbing the damn stuff in with rubber gloves. I wanted the alluring, sun-kissed, sexy look. I've achieved smelling like burnt popcorn and the cats won't stop licking me. I'm a salt lick for cats.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
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