This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
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