sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Randomize
