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put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
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