There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Randomize