wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Randomize