THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Enjoy the penises
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
Randomize
