Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
