....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
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