everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
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