She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
Randomize
