PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
This is my life. Enjoy the view
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize
