hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
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