official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Randomize
