There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Randomize
