i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Randomize
