how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
Randomize
