Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Randomize
