In the future we'll all be gay
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize
