there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
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