I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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