Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
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