I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
i out mim tonsoeep
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