I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
Randomize