My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Randomize
