the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
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