I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Randomize
