Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
Randomize
