Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
Randomize
