weddingsv make me drug and hornr
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
In other news, I just burned my penis
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
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