i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
Randomize
