how can u be prego again
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
Dear sober self: your car keys are in the glove compartment, your car is outside the church. I hope you're reading this from your own bed instead of someone else's.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
Randomize