you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
