yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
Randomize