dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
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