And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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