I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
